Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Louis Ate Sh*t Today

Louis ate shit today. This is not a euphemism for falling on his face, taking a tumble, etc. He actually ate shit. As in excrement. Of the human variety.

Like most boys his age, Lou is obsessed with his, ahem, junk. In fact, whenever he gets a diaper change it's the first thing he goes for. I am usually a step ahead of him and when said diaper is fully loaded, I clean the junk first and then it isn't a big deal when he puts his hands there (yes, yes, I wash his hands immediately after). Today, however, I opened his diaper to find a big, steamy, smells-like-the-zoo-on-a-hot-day mess and he immediately.... GRABBED HIS BUTT CHEEKS. With both hands. Butt cheeks that were smeared in a thick layer of, well, shit. Oh, the horror. I froze for a split second because there was shit everywhere on his lower body, and now on his hands as well. I frantically started wiping his hands first, but he jerked them away.

To put them both in his mouth. IN HIS MOUTH. My sweet baby boy ate a whole lotta shit. I was actually afraid he might choke, so I sat him up right away, fished it out as much as possible, and then hosed him down and let him drink as much water as he wanted. I was fully expecting there to be vomiting, considering the shit smelled as though it had come from an actual rhinoceros. But, Lou was pretty much unfazed by the whole ordeal. I, on the other hand, may never recover.

Enjoying a lasagna, pea, mango (and shit free) dinner.


Christina said...

Oh Janet, that so made me laugh and I hope to NEVER experience that with Faustino!

aileen said...

HILARIOUS! Just wait til you tell that story to prospective girlfriends!

Nayoung said...

he is still so cute!